Twinkle: The Epic Swingset Battle

I just waged it, and won.

It happened, conveniently enough for Mr. Twinkle, when he and Twinklette had just left for a little early afternoon sledding in the park. It's probably better that I handled it myself. If I'd sent him out there to deal with the situation, I would have a swingset smack dab in the middle of my back yard right now. I would also have no hope of a garden, ever.

It was a hard-fought battle. My FIL and the handyman, Terry, had the thing set up right in the center, where it would have taken up every square inch of any garden I'd ever hoped to have. They tried to argue that I needed to watch the children from inside the house. They tried to argue that my ideal placement of the swingset wouldn't work because of the trees/garage, and because the swingset is a behemoth. My FIL even said, "Can't you just plant tomatoes in that corner over there?"

And you, my attorney friends, would have been so proud of me. I was not intimidated by these two men trying to tell me how to use my yard. I stood up for myself! I made my case for not needing to watch the children from the house. I argued that I thought it would fit, which was the whole reason why we measured before choosing the swingset in the first place. I said that no, a corner of the yard reserved for tomatoes is unacceptable. (I'm pretty sure my FIL doesn't begin to comprehend my grandiose Carloftis-like vision. And why would he, when he has spent his entire life with a woman completely devoid of imagination?). It was my own little feminist rebellion against the patriarchy. Hands off my womb and my garden, sons of b*tches!

I know my FIL is probably annoyed with me for not just going with what he wanted for the yard and the swingset. (Terry was slightly nicer about it). Maybe I seem like a spoiled b*tch, or some annoying harridan who will not be silenced. But am I really so spoiled for wanting my yard the way I want it? I think it's a pretty reasonable request, and there are worse things to want in life than a garden.

Anyway, I won. After several configurations and a lot of attitude from my FIL, who no one in the family ever stands up to, the swingset is going to be nestled under the trees, behind the garage, in the shade, out of sight from the house, and not taking up any (or all) precious sunny spots in the yard. And it actually doesn't look half bad. It looks like a really nice place for little girls to play...and it'll be even better when I go all Carloftis back there.

I sort of have to now, don't I?