Dear War Bride,
I received your invitation in the mail yesterday. Since there was no contact information given for the "hostesses" of said shower, and your name and address appeared as the return address on the envelope, I'm directing this RSVP to you.
As an aside - Miss Manners would not approve of arranging your own shower, dear. No wonder my aunt didn't sound terribly enthusiastic when she told me about it: I thought maybe it was just that she knew good manners would dictate that she, as your mother-in-law, ought not be hosting. Now I suspect that you asked her to front it while you plan everything yourself. Tacky. Where was I? Oh yes ...
It was very sweet of you to send me an invitation - although I already told my aunt (the putative hostess) that I would not be able to attend, so, when taken with your own name on the return address, it starts to look a bit like gift-grubbing. Very tacky. Where was I? Oh yes ...
I would rather shove bamboo under my fingernails than spend a Saturday afternoon at your baby shower. So although I don't have any scheduling conflicts on the books as of yet, you can be damn sure that I will come up with one between now and July 2.
Hope you have a wonderful time!
Best,
Julep
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