I just got back...it was fabulous and yadda yadda yadda. Really, I mostly ignored my in-laws, but any day in which I travel with them is bound to be filled with drama.
So here is one major grievance from today, plus two more earlier ones that I forgot.
Earlier ones:
1). Diapers. I didn't know what the diaper situation would be on the island, so I packed a week's worth of both swim and regular diapers, and figured I'd have that much more room in my suitcase on the way back. Without even consulting me, MIL went to the grocery store in Aruba and stocked up on Twinklette's variety of Pampers, so we had double the diapers we needed for the week and I ended up having to find a place for them in my luggage on the way back. I don't mean to look a gift bag of Pampers in the mouth (although we did pay for them)...maybe it would have been a nice gesture if the overall circumstances were different; maybe I would have considered it nice if she'd said, "Hey--I'm going to the grocery store. Do you need any diapers?" Instead, she just assumed that I didn't have the diaper angle covered and she had to swoop in and take care of it. Again, MIL...I have my sh*t together, and can anticipate my child's needs ahead of time without your help.
2). Elmo vs. Dora. MIL knows how I feel about licensed characters, but what does she pull out on the flight home tonight? A fucking Elmo sticker book. I hate that red somb*tch. Susan, my sister-in-law's MIL (who's super-sweet) got Twinklette a Dora sticker book, and even though Twinklette doesn't watch Dora or know who she is, she really liked it and I appreciated the gesture. After all, Susan doesn't know about me and my crazy ideas about marketing to children. So we graciously accepted the book, Twinklette loves it, and I'm OK with it because I don't have to let her watch the show or even know Dora's name.
Sesame Street is different. Twinklette knows Elmo and Cookie Monster because my MIL introduced the show behind my back. I'm sure she thinks it's educational (I actually beg to differ) and that my objection is based on some ridiculous political bias against the show's liberalism (I couldn't care less about that). Y'all know my objection is based on unfair marketing to children, and I also resent the fact that my MIL is so disrespectful of my beliefs and wishes on the matter.
So, the Dora sticker book comes out and MIL goes, "Twinklette, who's that?" Now, if I don't let my child watch Sesame Street on KET, you'd better believe she's not watching any Dora the Explorer on Nick Jr. (You should see the horrible video gaming Web sites that advertise on Nickelodeon.com and even NickJr.com). I'm not sure if my MIL was trying to expose me as a fraud or what (like, I'm letting her watch Dora but not Sesame Street). I have no idea what she was thinking. Twinklette had no answer--she doesn't know Dora from Shinola. I was scared Susan would think Twinklette didn't like the gift, and I certainly wasn't going to explain my objection when Susan's intentions were good and a sticker book alone is totally harmless.
Today:
3). The airport arrival. Our flight out of Aruba was at 3 p.m. We went to breakfast with the whole crowd, stopped to buy some last-minute Dutch cookies at 10:30, and then Susan and her very nice, very fun husband Skip wanted to stop in downtown Oranjestad for a little more shopping before getting to the airport. The rental car we were sharing with my in-laws was too crowded with luggage, so we were riding with Susan and Skip (how convenient!), and the four of us agreed that there was no need to get to the airport 5 hours early.
Well, when we stopped for Dutch cookies, my in-laws did not like the sound of delaying our arrival at the airport, so they essentially came over to Skip and Susan's car and made us get back in their car and go to the airport with them (like a couple of delinquent teenagers who were out past curfew), so that we'd have plenty of time for customs and TSA and all that. Well, that stuff did take forever. But we made it in plenty of time, and guess who we saw on the other side of all those long lines: Skip and Susan, who stopped in Oranjestad and still made it in plenty of time.
I checked out of the whole thing early on, and decided I didn't really care about any of it. But the bottom line is this: they are fucking insane.
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