"I traded eyeliner for dark circles, salon hair cuts for ponytails, long showers for hairy legs, late nights for early mornings, designer purses for diaper bags and I wouldn't change a thing!! With Mother's Day drawing near, let's see how many Moms repost this."
If y'all think that's sweet, I totally understand. It makes me want to gag myself with a spoon. It was posted today by one of my sorority sisters who's reinvented herself as a Disney Princess. Actually, that's a pretty impressive feat, as she spend her college years with her knees behind her head on the Phi Tau floor. But I digress...
Here's problem one. This particular girl lives in a resort town complete with nannies and diamond tennis bracelets. She hasn't really traded down from her years in a south-end high school.
And...problem two. If every mother really gave up shaving her legs and wearing makeup forever, well, we'd have a whole lot more only children, wouldn't we? And no more Kate Spade or salons ever? Ever? How do those places stay in business? Single girls and grandmas? Bee-atch, please.
Okay, I'm going over to facebook to hide Tinkerbell. I'll be back.
Your friend's attitude annoys me like mom jeans...("Because I'm not a woman anymore; I'm a mom.") I don't think this sentiment is sweet; I think it's just as sickening as you do. It's also not true. I treasure my salon visits now more than ever, own a designer diaper bag (it's Lill...totally Chicago chic mommy), and actually leave my kid in her crib after she wakes up from her nap every day while I shower and dry my hair (so I don't have to do it at night, during my "personal time.") I apply makeup in the car, while Twinklette is safely strapped into her carseat...because it's a lot easier to do it there than to interrupt my mascara application multiple times while I chase her around keeping her from hurting herself or destroying our home. Your friend would probably think that makes me suck as a mother...and, honestly, so would my MIL.
ReplyDeleteKudos on the cattiness of this blog entry, Dibbs...I don't know what I love more, the "knees behind her head on the Phi Tau floor" or the "south end high school." Meow!
Not sweet or precious. Just dumb. Her adventures in motherhood pretty much sound like my five week stint in Guatemala circa 1996. No eyeliner: check; pony tails for my one-shower-per-week locks: check; hairy legs: check; early mornings by the rooster crow: check; and definitely no designer bags.
ReplyDeleteEveryone who thinks Tinkerbell's version of motherhood sounds like living in a third-world country, re-post this!
Happy Mother's Day, b*tches!
xoxo
LoLa
And that's why I love y'all!
ReplyDelete