Maybe it's the onset of cold weather that has made me pensive.
I've been remembering a blog post Chi-Chi wrote quite some time ago (which I started to look for and then gave up on), about being addicted to her child and how she would literally run through the hall at school to pick him up. I totally feel that way with the Bear. He is so sweet right now, and he is actually becoming a person - our "talks" are very slowly evolving from my monologues to include his comments. He answered a fairly complex question yesterday, and I was so tickled. He is thinking in there, and he is starting to be able to tell me about it, and it is so enchanting.
I find myself sensing the passage of time in a way that I never really have before. In part it's kid-related, as I know that this sweet epoch with the Bear will not last forever ... not to say that the next phase won't be wonderful too, but being aware that this particular phase is going to pass makes it so bittersweet.
I'm also realizing my mom's mortality in a new way, at the same time that I am treasuring her so much. I see my mom Wednesday, as I have for the past decade - but lately I find myself calling her several other times a week, to share a cute moment or ask her advice on how to handle something. I really can't imagine what life will be like without my mother, yet I am becoming aware that she will not be here forever. She's in fine health -- the Parkinsonian thing isn't slowing her down -- but it's coming, someday.
I want to wrap my arms around them and hold on. Nothing gold can stay....
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